[DarkSilver]

Basic Information
Name:Elecno (his name has nothing to do with the fact that he has lightning powers. I came up with those after i came up with a name
Age:18
Gender:Male
Species:Hedgehog
Fur/feather/scale/skin: Navy with yellow streaks (his bottom two spikes are down while the top two are up)
Eyes:Purple
Height:average
Build:thin
Attire:two thick gold bands on his wrist, white gloves, blue shoes (like Sonic's no rings and a stripe through the middle as well)

Theme Words
First:Lightning
Ability/item 1:Shock (more for stunning strands of navy electricity that extends from 2- 4 feet depending on actions used [1 action= 2 ft 2 actions= 3ft 3 actions= 4 ft does not allow the afflicted to dodge or block for 2 actions])
Ability/item 2:Shock Bomb (Elecno forces electric energy into the ground to make a bomb-like attack stuns and inflicts light damage ranges from 2-4ft in diameter [1 action= 2ft 2 actions=3ft 3 actions=4ft does not allow the afflicted to dodge or block for 2 actions])
Second:Athlete
Ability/item 1:Super Speed (35mph 1 action to maintain 25-30mph, 2 actions to maintain 31-35mph)
Ability/item 2:High Jumping (not a too significant difference 3ft more at best [where regular jumping is 2-3ft])
Third:Speed
Ability/item 1:Lightning Glide (when he goes full speed [36-45mph relies completely on electric ability] )
Ability/item 2:Lightning Dash (inflicts light damage [only goes a short distance of 5ft, 20mph when still or not running, 40mph when running] when not running costs 2 actions when running costs 1 action but stops him immediately afterward)

Role Playing
Back-story: As a young child, Elecno spent the most of his time out by the city. He was always obedient about getting home on time. But one time when he had gotten lost in the city, a human found him and took him to a strange building. The human was indeed a mad scientist. Days before an unforeseen operation by this mad scientist, he had confided in Elecno about himself and his purposes. Elecno became suspicious about him and was very aware about what the mad man was doing. But it all changed with a twist of fate...

The mad scientist, seeing Elecno as more of a guinea pig, decided to finally try his new experiment on him. He called it "Experiment X" for he had not tested it yet. This particular experiment was a navy goo-like substance that was supposed to give powers based on the personality and experiences of the being. He persuaded Elecno that it was safe to use and Elecno had trusted him foolishly.

He was sealed in a chamber with "Experiment X." As the procedure began, the substance crawled up Elecno, causing pain. The dark goo sucked away at his life, draining years off it. Elecno cried to the man behind the glass. "I don't want to die..," Elecno spluttered out in between desperate sobs. The scientist showed no remorse. Eventually, the substance was absorbed by Elecno, who at this point, was dead. After years and years, he finally awoke (He is not undead, zombie-like, etc.). Not realizing his power, he set to return home. He had no home to return to...

The city had finally killed off the last of the Eastern Forest. The whereabouts of his parents are unknown, but he had sworn to defend every living creature against this evil that had destroyed his forest.

Example Post
Elecno gazed up at the machine with wonder. Could this be the exact same person behind the city expansion, Elecno thought.
As if something read his mind, a unfamiliar voice rang down from the machine.
"Ah. Another pesky hedgehog to deal with,"the voice menacingly echoed from above.
"Who are you and what have you done to the Forest?" Elecno rapidly demanded.
"My, my. Aren't we getting ahead of ourselves," the voice sang, "I am Doctor Ivo 'Eggman' Robotinik! And I have turned your precious forest into EGGMANLAND!"
"I'll get you for this!" Elecno yelled up to 'Eggman.'

This post has been edited by DarkSilver: 24 June 2009 - 11:35 PM

[NiGHTS Noob]

You've got no example post.

Also, you can't have a two word theme word. Just make it something else, like Current or something, it'll work fine.

Now for the nitty gritty: You don't have any values or real explanations for the abilities. Shock stuns, okay, but exactly how? Does it rob the opponent of one or two of their next actions? Also what is the cost to you? How does it connect? We need to know these things.

Ex. Shock- An attack that stuns the opponent. Opponent loses the ability to dodge for the post after the post where this attack connects. It costs two actions and is a bolt that extends approximately 2 feet from Elecno's hand.

You see? It's not too hard, but almost everything's going to need it:

How fast can he go exactly? How many actions per post does it take to maintain that speed? Does going over a certain speed begin to tire him quickly?

How high can he jump? Is it just a slight boost to a normal jump, or is it a significantly larger jump that takes up extra actions?

The lightning glide would give him immunity to things on the ground right? I think "Must be at full speed" is a good cost for it as long as you end up giving the Super Speed a cost.

The lightning dash requires costs too. Can he only do it while gliding? Or can he do it at anytime and it just has some extra cost than a normal attack?

This post has been edited by NiGHTS Noob: 24 June 2009 - 10:35 PM

[NiGHTS Noob]

4-6ft diameter for the Shock Bombs are way, way too big. Maybe 4 for 2 actions and 6 for three, or maybe even a little smaller.

Beyond that, you still haven't explained exactly what the stun does. Does it make them lose a number of actions? Or does it prevent them from doing specific actions?

Our RP uses a massively toned down speed system. Many things speculate Sonic going at 180mph or more, but considering the fact that vehicles and special abilities are in play, the base speeds are significantly slower for RP characters. Most characters will run somewhere between 20 and 40 based on weight and athletic ability. Anything above 55 or 60 is probably going to tire someone out quickly, and I'd say the absolute maximum run speed has to remain in the double digits (like 95 or so). Give us an exact speed.

Also you misread my post. The Lightning Glide thingy probably doesn't need any sort of cost as long as Super Speed has it's cost. Merely the full speed requirement is enough (I'm considering full speed within 5-10 mph of the characters absolute maximum limit).

Oh, and Lightning Dash still doesn't have a good enough description.

Keep trying, it might be a little messily written out, but when I really look at it I can tell it's almost there.

[Pyroman]

This looks fine to me.

Approved.