[dragon jake]

Info
Name:flame
Age:14
Gender:male
Species:bird
Fur/feather/scale/skin:red and black feathers
Eyes:black
Height:3'3
Build:normal
Attire:red and black gloves and red and black boots with spikes on them

Weapons/Items/Powers/Abilities:
1)long sword-3 strength

2)machine gun with 5 ammo (15)-2 strenght

3)dagger-3 strenght

4)pistol with 3 ammo (9)-2 strenght

Stats: allocate points here. Total number of points cannot exceed 50.

Strength: 10

Agility: 15

Vitality: 15

Lesser skills: swimming

Character Development

Backstory: flame was just a bio-weapon created by a mad scienist to start with, but then he broke free and works on the good side but has no freinds, but he has also forgot who made him but he dont care because he has more important things to do like fight evil and likes chill by himself and also he loves to sit and meditate and the weapons he uses are the ones he found.

Personality: happy,can be moody if annoyed,energetic,adventurous,sarcastic

Example post:
flame:shurly you can do better than that.

evil robot:SHUT UP YOU ANOYING TOAD!

flame:HA! Im a bird you idiot.

evil robot:NEVER THE LESS I WILL ANIALATE YOU! *the evil robot lunges at flame but he dogdes like it was nothink*

flame: *yawns* come on try a bit hard then you might be able to hit me *laughs* notice how i said might, becuase you wont slow poke.

evil robot: SHUT UP!!! *turns a shoots a beam and nocks flame flying into a wall*

flame: ha ha ha. nice try at least you got me, try a bit hard though and you might actualy kill me.

evil robot: SHUTTTTT UUUUUUP!!! *the evil robot lunges just klipping flame*

flame: temper temper, no wonder you cant hit, me your tempers a shame control it.

*evil robot lunges hitting flame down*
evil robot: how that?

flame:uhn, *coughs* my turn *flame gets up and then lunges at the evil robot stabing him in the chest*

evil robot: call that a blow?

flame:no, but this is. *flame slices the robots head*but that is*turns and walks of*

This post has been edited by dragon jake: 25 March 2009 - 09:05 PM

[HTM]

Welcome, new member.

For starters, now, I won't complain about the name, but.

The age is unknown. No, that's a no no. Get yourself a real age, because the unknown age is just too cliché, and that's not a good thing.
Using canon characters as reference in Height and Weight is a no no as well. I suppose your character is 3'3" tall, so copypasta that into your height. As for weight, compensate it for his height.
Your weapons need statistics. It can be found in one if the pinned topics.
At least you understand the SAVLS (Strength Agility Vitality Lesser Skills) system.

And then backstory... Fine enough, sure, it's cliché, but that's how it is about new people. But having your fan character interfering with canon characters ain't going to work, y'know? It's not great, so please edit that out?
I like the personality, though.
And the example post must be longer. A lot longer.

And that I think is it.

[dragon jake]

wtf is canon characters

[dragon jake]

and also thanks for the info

[dragon jake]

is that a bit better

[nick_phizz]

How the hell do you have 0 posts?

[dragon jake]

i dont know. Thats stange

[Shock]

nick_phizz, on Mar 25 2009, 04:28 AM, said:

How the hell do you have 0 posts?

I was wondering the same..perha-..nah. Anyhow, this is a nice character, better than the picture. But I'd like to point out that his name [flame] is a little unoriginal. But I guess if he didn't have parents, he cant really have a normal name. Still, I reccomend coming up with something a bit more original. I can't think of anything right now, I will tell you if I do.

Also, in the RP system around here, stuff like "flame: yo dawg" doesnt really work. I suggest looking at the rp threads to see what post format to use.

This post has been edited by Shock: 25 March 2009 - 02:25 PM

[dragon jake]

thanks but excep those points you said how good do you think it is

[Kvitne]

He has 0 posts because he's only posted in the RP section. Your post count doesn't go up from posts in the RP section.

Also, please don't post multiple times in a row. Use the edit button if you have something to add to your post. Or just wait until someone else has posted. Thanks.

[dragon jake]

ok thank for the info

[Shock]

Kvitne, on Mar 25 2009, 06:35 AM, said:

He has 0 posts because he's only posted in the RP section. Your post count doesn't go up from posts in the RP section.

Also, please don't post multiple times in a row. Use the edit button if you have something to add to your post. Or just wait until someone else has posted. Thanks.

Nice new signature. and thanks, for the info.

And to satisfy DJ's want for comments on his character, nice job, though I already said that

[dragon jake]

Shock, on Mar 25 2009, 02:40 PM, said:

And to satisfy DJ's want for comments on his character, nice job, though I already said that

soz for asking you again

[Kvitne]

I'll ask you one last time. Please fix your spelling and grammar. I don't want to have to take action on this.

[dragon jake]

Kvitne, on Mar 25 2009, 03:13 PM, said:

I'll ask you one last time. Please fix your spelling and grammar. I don't want to have to take action on this.

like how?
i usaly dont fight with people but if you want i will.
and any way i have dislecier.

[Kvitne]

Dyslexia has nothing to do with it. Most browsers these days have a spell checker, and if yours doesn't then we have a spell checker provided when you post. In addition, you really should capitalize your sentences and use proper punctuation, like commas in the right places and periods at the end of sentences.

[Shock]

dragon jake, on Mar 25 2009, 07:20 AM, said:

like how?
i usaly dont fight with people but if you want i will.
and any way i have dislecier.

Agreeing with Kvitne on the dyslexia comment, sorry. And I know Kvitne said to treat hi normally, but still, avoid fighting with a moderator, because they might get sick of it and just edit your posts.

[Kvitne]

I wouldn't do that unless I was fooling around. Other actions though...

[HTM]

Better, but there are sheets for weapons in the pinned topics here.

The "canon" means, in my definition, "official" cast. Having any sort of interactions with, let's say, Sonic, and it's interference with a canon character. It doesn't make your character cool in any way anyway, so...

I know you can do a longer example post. PLEASE!

[NiGHTS Noob]

OK, so anyways, I'm here now.

Your character is actually pretty close rule wise. Only a couple problems.

Your weapons can have ten stat points max (2 less for each special abilities), and there's really no reason to not use up all your points. Other than that, the first weapon needs some fixing up. Neither of the special abilities are real special abilities. Don't worry though, you can shoot multiple shots in one turn with any ranged weapon, you just need to pay 2 agility for each shot.

Also, your example post needs to be a full on paragraph with an example of either character interaction or fighting style, or both.